UNNECESSARY GRAVITAS

As Slate's media watchdog, it is Jack Shafer's job to police the press - to alert the cyberpublic to hype, artificial trends, statistical malfeasance and other ways in which those who have the primary soapboaxes distort our public discourse. In his latest column Shafer takes Nicholas Kristof, one of the regular columnists at the World's Greatest Newspaper to task for unfairly picking on Fox News Bloviator-in-Chief Bill O'Reilly. According to Shafer, Kristof's well has run dry, which is why he has taken to goading O'Reilly for choosing to use his uber-bully pulpit to fight on the front lines in the War Against Christmas while ignoring the ongoing genocide in Darfur.

Then, putting the non into non sequitur, Kristof challenged O'Reilly to use his media power to "stand up to genocide in Darfur" instead of contesting the nonexistent war on Christmas. "If you really want to defend traditional values, then come with me on a trip to Darfur," he wrote.

As Kristof readers know, he's such a frequent visitor to the Darfur slaughterhouse that he's purchased a time-share condominium there. I jest, of course, but there's something around the bend about Kristof's Darfur-instead-of-Christmas harping. Every journalist who chooses to report on Subject A receives critical mail and phone calls from folks who insist that the journalist should be reporting on Subject B if he thinks A is a problem. Kristof must think it's clever to stoop to a gambit that's beneath any self-respecting blogger.

Shafer, who feels free to jest about a little ethnic cleansing among Africans, is downright offended by Kristof's violation of the first law of punditry - thou shall not opine on the subject matter of other pundits. Really, who is anyone to judge whether Subject A is any worthier than Subject B? Shafer defends O'Reilly's divine right as a pundit to decide that Wal-Mart's phrasing of its holiday greetings is worth nightly moral outrage, but the greatest ongoing crime against humanity is worthy of nary a peep.

Shafer is also upset by Kristof's refusal to treat his columns as simply a day job. Poor Nick can't seem to keep mass slaughter in proper perspective. He just keeps returning to that depressing topic, column after column after column.

And so Shafer flags Kristof for unnecessary gravitas. Enough already with the genocide, Nick, Jack is bored. And while you're at it, can you get Thomas Friedman to stop it with his crusade for energy efficiency. No matter how many times he says "Manhattan Project" its not gonna happen. And could you get Bob Herbert to let go of the racism thing? After all, that whole Tulia story was a real drag to read about. I'm sure we can find someone to lighten up the page - how about the latest observations on how exurban consumer patterns define American politics from David Brooks or more musings on modern dating from Maureen Dowd. Please, if Americans wanted to deal with Darfur already, wouldn't they? I mean sure the situation is awful, and the world's response varies between malign neglect and token measures, but the last thing that's called for is journalistic gimmicks.

Oh, Nick, while your at it, why stop with O'Reilly? I'd like to chip in for a plane ticket for Jack Shafer to come along. (I'll even donate my old New Republics so he can catch up on his Marty Peretz columns!!) And if Jack can't fit such a trip to Nick's "time-share" into his busy schedule than I have a suggestion for him - stop writing hit pieces attacking the few decent pundits who are desperately trying to focus public discourse on the issues that truly matter. Otherwise, Slate is going to need a Media Watchdog watchdog.