THE REST OF THE WORLD'S CUP

The World...yawn...Cup...yawn...starts tommorrow, which of course means we're in for another round of "why can't Americans love soccer like everybody else?" The implication that is if you like soccer, you're a cultured, international citizen of the world - and if you prefer the garish basketball, the brutish football, or the inscrutable baseball you're myopic and insular. Well guess what, this Foreign Affairs devotee ain't buying it. Soccer is not high culture - its a game, and a rather dull one at that, in which all but two of the players can't use their hands, and every once in a while someone actually kicks or heads a ball towards a net in which one of those two people is standing. I'll be the first one to condemn my fellow Americans (with the exception of Ashleigh Banfield who's everywhere!!!) blithe ignorance of the world but give up watching hoopsters soar to watch soccer players flop? No thanks. You may not be able to beat Thai food, Italian art and Latin dance music, but there's nothing that comes close to American sports.